Lost & Found

An endless passage an empty street,

An empty lone room can be more than it seems.

Thousands of thought and an empty feeling,

I realized I am lost in between all the shiny bling.

Lost in the thoughts,

Hidden in the corners of my brain,

M’ lost in the expedition,

M’ lost in the lane.

Lost in the sorrows,

M’ lost in the smiles,

I’ll bring me back to life,

But let me be lost for a while.

M’ lost in the Ice,

M’ lost in the fire,

M’ lost in the traces of an unknown Desire.

It’s pouring hard outside,

M’ lost in the droplets of rain,

M’ lost in the ease,

M’ lost in the pain.

I hope someone will find me,

I am somewhere close.

I am lost in those thorns,

In the petals of Rose

I am Lost in those deserts,

I am Lost in sand dunes,

M’ lost in the ocean,

In the notes of a tune

Lost in the sleeve, m’ lost in the hood,

M lost in the bad, m’ lost in the good.

I wish to be found and I guess…

Someone surely would…!!

Someone would switch on the light,

And find me if he could…

M’ lost in that ray of sun,

M’ lost in the woods.

I knew I was walking,

I sensed I lost the path…

And when I found my destination,

My path forgot the math.

I am Lost in the monsoon shower,

Lost in the summer breeze,

Lost in the spring that hovers,

M’ lost in a falling leaf.

Find me if you know where m’ I?

Find me in the truths, find me through the lies.

Find me on the shore in the castle of sand,

The wave must have drowned me to another land.

I lost myself to be found once again,

To see who finds me… to know who can’t…

To find who clings… to find who’ll leave…

To find out all the notions my heart believes.

In all these moments of being lost,

I found myself a real me.

Found all the answers hidden in a plea.

I found the simplicity behind the spree.

In the middle of a sandstorm,

I was a struggling flower…

I was lost in the weakness, but found myself in the power…!!

-Pratishtha.

Complicated Heart

I saw dreams,

Lovely, incredible, filled with gleam,

Walking in a lane, flowers in my path,

It’s hard to fathom this complicated heart,

God knew my queries, my question that I asked,

The more I frowned… the more he laughed.

A piece of text, a group of words, a simple phrase,

My heart feeling abandoned, looking for a place,

Reading & re-reading one simple name,

My eyes never tire, never ended the game…

Held tight, all the strength & smile on your door,

Later you discover, what you had was just the floor.

And you find out it wasn’t yours that you wore,

And wonder if it’s ever gonna be yours?

I loved living in dreams,

Truth banged my head…

I somehow befriended the truth,

Dreams felt sad, alone, but never said.

There was a reason why I saved myself those memories,

Everyone laughed…

Everyone told me what they feel,

What I want… nobody asked.

I had a choice to make… I had 2 ways to go,

Thought one of them, I was definitely sure.

I kept standing they chose it for me on their own,

What I longed for, no one ever known.

Walking down an empty street with an endless gaze,

“You’ve something in your mind…” they say.

My heart has inside it, millions of verbs & nouns,

I don’t know if m’ standing still or going down…

Large waves hitting noisily on the rocks in my heart,

My thoughts are frayed… they were not in the start…

Rain drops kept dangling over me above,

But they never knew about the things I love.

All I wanted was to feel the new sun on my face,

Wanted to walk this life as a smooth maze…

And in my answer they gave me this complicated heart that never behaved…

Yes I was walking in a lane with flowers in my path,

But it’s still hard to fathom this complicated heart.

                                                                                 - Pratishtha

Well it’s hard to fathom (understand) what I wrote here… so... never mind ;)

Little Things...

Little things…

You feel them everyday & you may not know they say something.

Sometimes you cry, sometimes you sing,

Sometimes you fall down… sometimes you swing…

Sometimes while standing high on a hill,

Wind blows across your hair & lips…

And suddenly you want to open up your arms n smile,

And wrap yourself in your arms, thinking of someone special, making it worthwhile.

Little things… yet they mean a lil’ something,

Sometimes while swinging on a swing,

You take some nice steps & pitch yourself high,

As if you wanna fly… high up in the sky…

Little things… you would never think…

Why you felt happy when someone special saw you & winked?

Yeah… it’s not a little thing, having your first kiss,

But it is when you close your eyes & smile, every time you think of it.

Sometimes sitting at the terrace, staring at the sky,

Waiting for a star to fall at night,

So that you can make one of your wish come true,

And you fall asleep, waiting all through…

Little things…

While standing in a park in the middle of a street,

A tiny droplet of rain fall on your sleeve,

And you look up in the sky & watch thousands of them falling on your face,

You just smile & do nothing; instead let them wet you all through your way.

Sometimes taking a long walk in the dark,

You see a star smiling to you & you smile back at the star,

And you decide to sleep on the hammock in the garden & walk on wet grass bare foot,

And you watch trees dancing with the wind and you want to be a flower in them too.

Walking on a silent beach or on a sea shore,

Staring at the horizon & sparkling stones,

You take a deep breath & smile on your mind & on things going around in it,

They, who never leave you alone, are these tiny little things...

Little things… they happen with us all the time…

But often… we are just too busy to notice….!!

Take some time out for yourself… feel them… enjoy them…!!

 -Pratishtha

Life in Dreams

Life in Dreams

“How long have you been dreaming?” A question hard to answer... probably not... maybe! What was the first one that you dreamt? A scary nightmare because you saw a hideous toy before going to sleep...  or an unknown path on which you were walking, tripped and fell down just to realize that it was just a dream.

Knowingly or unknowingly we have been dreaming from the time this small thing called mind was created. And now when I have traveled through the wilderness of my small life, I have come to realize that the meaning of this word ‘DREAM’ has been changing with every single step or rather every event of our life that we update on our Facebook timelines.

Dreaming of a scary night when you are stuck with a monster back in childhood... Dreaming of an exam in which you ran out of ink or almost forgot about the exam when you are a little grown up... dreaming of an absolutely perfect date with your crush in your teenage... dreaming about a perfect job and  a rich life when you are a little bit more responsible... and then.. Dreaming about all the good things when you are going through a bad phase... And then everything changes! The eyes are no more closed and deep inside your heart you start hoping all your dreamy imaginations will come true one day.

And then slowly your naïve hopes and expectations start finding solace in these sleepless dreams. Not to forget these dreams, when taken aback by reality, drifts you back to a state of despair. Despite of all the cons that these intoxicating clouds of imagination have, I love them... because they make you live each and every jiffy of that moment when you are building stories of your perfect encounter with life. And if you use your left side of your brain (the imaginative one), well then your silly, untamed dreams will let you live each and every joy you wanted to live, each and every curve that you wanted to smile, each and every tear that you wanted to cry, and all the hopes and surprises that you wanted to be true... someday!

Yes... That is why I love my Life in Dreams! Because they let me live a life that I wanted to live... and there is nobody to question. What difference does it make if it is real or not, if it makes you happier than you are in reality. At least you lived each and every moment that you wanted to and it made every second worthwhile.

So when I was extremely sad... crying like hell and sought support, could not talk to the people around me still wanted to be found out, consoled and healed, I stood up from my bed and went downstairs. I sat all by myself in the parking and cried till the tear bucket was empty. And just when I had enough of gaping and hoping to be found out, my friends, family and significant others came running... looking for me, found me, hugged me, asked me and healed me. That was what I dreamt of... with eyes wide open, sitting all by myself in that parking lot. What did reality give me? No one! What did my dream gave me... everything I wanted and just the way it was needed. And I pictured it again and again in my head... and that gave me peace and I smiled to myself. I lived that moment exactly the way I wanted to.

That was a single incidence from my treasure. But I live in dreams. It’s like a completely different life that I live, every day, every hour, every second, even every heart beat.

So the conclusion is... one has to fall down one day or another says reality. Things won’t happen the way you expect them to. So why not fly high before you fall, says a dream. Because to fly high and then fall is way better than to crawl and fall when both hurts the same. At least you could see the whole world, rather whole world’s happiness, from the heights that you flew.

Keep dreaming! ;)

- Pratishtha

Leap of Faith

Good & Evil… everyone has both the sides… and no one knows it better then himself. You can’t have everything in life. Nothing will last forever. No one will stay with you forever. Some things you own, because they are made for you… some things are yours because you ran into them & now they are yours. Some things you boast… some things you regret.

The flowers will dry… maybe sooner than you thought they would. The rain that you loved may distort your view. Everyone won’t always act the way you've thought. Expectations are exquisite to imagine but they go empty…  And sometime later, when you are sitting under the blue sky & thinking about what went wrong… you can’t lie to yourself. Somewhere deep down inside, you knew it was coming..!!

Everyone has a day of being ‘weak’, ‘weary’, ‘bleak ‘, ‘abandoned’… a day of despair… familiar words… aren't they? And you feel like being the best actor in the world… You won’t let anyone know you are falling, neither will anyone notice and that’s what hurts the most.

You would want to shove off your cell phone, wear your deepest of thoughts & sit alone for a while to discover new depths. You would want the dark crater to swallow you completely. But what matters is to have someone to pull you out of that pit. Most imperative is that.. 'that' person knows ‘when & how’. He should know that it’s him, though it rarely happens. You’ll be devoted to be in that dark pit and may of may not struggle to come up. You’ll want to be alone but not “left alone”. There lies a big difference only a few know!!

But then these moments are the ‘Escapes’ that you were longing for a long time, knowingly or unknowingly. The ‘Break Away’ that lets you abscond to a new day, a lighter world in which you can grab and hold yourself together and through. You’ll find all your answers and know all the strategies.  A world where it’ll be just you.

You… Making promises to self…

You… Knowing all the facts & figures…

You... Trying to smile for no one else but for your own self

You… Taking that “LEAP OF FAITH”

There’s always a little hope in despair, a little laugh in a cry, a little confidence in every doubt, a little faith in qualm, a little truth in every lie, a little light in all dark.

Just keep your FAITH on that LEAP OF FAITH… and you my dear… hold the power to let a DRIED BUD BLOOM!

-Pratishtha Saxena